Just Tired
by alwayslucky13
Summary: Rachel Winchester was too tired. Tired of the bullying and of herself and of her life. Keeping her self-hatred to herself leads to a nasty habit. Will she ever tell her family so they can help her, or will Ray spiral downwards? (teenchesters protective!Dean Protective!Sam hurt!OC sisfic family fluff) WARNINGS: self harm, bullying, suicidal thoughts, slight eating disorder
1. Chapter 1

Rachel was tired. Not the cute, sleepy kind of tired though. The 11 cups of coffee and aching eyes sort of tired. The kind of tired that made her grumpy and short tempered and lose the colour from her face and the spark from her eyes. She was tired of life and she wanted to sleep for a very long time until it was all okay. But it would never be okay. Sleep couldn't bring her mum back and it couldn't make her more popular and it couldn't make her prettier and it couldn't give her the apple-pie life she yearned for. But she tried to sleep anyway.

Rachel and Sam had been in this town for a few weeks while Dean and her dad were on a hunt so much to her disappointment she had been made to go to school for the duration of their stay. Rachel hated school. She loved to learn like Sam and just absorbed knowledge but the hours of enclosed walls with shallow students who rejected any sign of abnormality and set out to make her life a living hell because she preferred books to make-up and the library over the mall were soul destroying. As a 15 year old hunter she could take down shapeshifters, gank demons and defeat ghosts but other teenagers, who threw insults at her, made her feel useless and weak. Rachel would never let on she was having a hard time to her brothers or dad, they were blissfully oblivious about it. But, nevertheless, the hate kept coming and her self-esteem was non-existent. Rachel was a Winchester. She refused to complain and just ignored it, letting the worthlessness build up in her gut until she felt like she'd explode.

She turned her head. 3:07am shone at her in vivid green light from the clock on the bedside table. Rachel fisted her pale hands into her dark brown hair in frustration that she couldn't let go of her consciousness. Her day had been long and tedious. This high school was like the others. One particular boy, Owen, decided it was his job to tell everyone that she was a whore and shoved her into a locker, earning a bruise on her shoulder. Sam had been particularly grouchy and complained to his sister about their deflating funds and stalked off to his room grumbling about Dad's lack of communication of how long he and Dean would be gone. Rachel was left in the kitchen with only the slamming of Sam's door as a farewell. She skipped dinner, not feeling the need to waste money, and crept to her own bed. 3:29am passed and the youngest Winchester was still turning in her bed. It was quiet and her churning thoughts were distracting. She felt personally responsible for her mother's death. If she hadn't cried that night then Mary Winchester wouldn't have come into her room and been killed by the demon. None of her family had ever blamed her but in the pit of her stomach she knew it was her fault. Rachel had continually failed her family. She had tripped up on hunts and got research wrong that could have been fatal. She was genuinely surprised that her brothers hadn't rejected her. All of her self-loathing bubbled to the surface and she had an itch in her left arm. Rachel had gained a nasty habit to help reduce the pressure under her skin that stemmed from her worthlessness. No longer ignoring the ache in her chest she slipped out of bed and padded to the bathroom, locking the door behind her. Rachel slipped the blade out of her pocket that she had taken from under her pillow and held it in her palm, considering if this would be a good idea. Her self-control was slipping and she pressed the cold metal against her forearm lightly. She breathed deeply, her chest heavy for a release and she drew a thin line into her skin. Beads of crimson collected in the shallow valley of broken flesh, dark in contrast to her pale arm. That was for not being enough. Another for being a burden. And again for being weak. Once more for the bruise she got today. Oh, one for pretending to be okay when Sam asked. Yet again for being pathetic. A final one for just being alive. Placing the blade in the sink gently she gazed transfixed at the 7 neat red lines in between the scars of her previous cuts. Letting go of a breath she hadn't even realised she was holding in Rachel let her shoulders slump, partly in relief of having a lighter weight on her shoulders but partly in guilt that she was a freak for what she'd just done. She couldn't let people know that she did this, especially her family; they'd probably hate her more. Pushing the thoughts aside she grabbed some tissue and wiped her arm clean before shrugging on a loose sweater and tiptoeing back to bed with her knife. Rachel slid the blade under her pillow for safe keeping next to her gun and fell into a weary slumber.

o-o-o-0-o-o-o

"Morning" Sam mumbled to his sister as he emerged from his room the next morning, hair sticking up at odd angles and rubbing his eyes.

"Hey Sam" she murmured back. Rachel was finishing off a piece of homework at the table and nursing a cup of coffee. A comfortable silence settled as Sam made some toast but he carefully scanned the young Winchester in big brother mode. He noticed his sister's clothes fitted a little less well than a week ago and her eyes were less bright. Sam cocked his head slightly to one side as he observed the dark circles under her eyes, her pale skin and unwashed hair pulled back into a messy ponytail. He hadn't properly taken in his baby sister's appearance for a while, he had been so caught up in trying to keep the money going and simultaneously attempting to keep up with school work. A pang of guilt hit him with the realisation that he hadn't been paying attention to Rachel's wellbeing as much as he'd like and something was definitely wrong judging by the hunched shoulders and glazed eyes.

"You alright, Ray?" Sam's voice startled Rachel. When he usually asked her that question it was light, a passing question that was probably not meant to be answered truthfully, like a brotherly obligation to ask it at least once a day. But this time Sam's eyes were a little wider, his eyebrows slightly furrowed and his tone genuinely concerned. Rachel realised that in her tired state she wasn't keeping up her usual content façade so she quickly forced her lips into a smile and nodded. Sam's frown deepened as the smile didn't reach her dead eyes and he was about to push further when his sister scuttled out of the room muttering an excuse. Something was wrong and it worried him but he didn't have the time right now so decided to pick the subject up after school.

John had gone with Dean in the Impala and had left his truck for Sam to use. Rachel and Sam drove to school in silence, both deep in thought. Sam was trying to come up with a theory as to why his sister was so… off. He didn't think she looked physically ill and he couldn't think of anything that she could be intensely worried about but Sam couldn't shake the feeling that he was missing something. As they pulled into the car park Rachel slowly started to gather her stuff and leave the car but Sam grabbed her shoulder.

"You know you can tell me anything, right? Just, you know, in case something is bothering you. I am your brother, Ray. I do worry about you." Sam's words held worry.

"It's fine Sammy. Don't worry about me." Sam noticed her forced smile again and he sighed and loosened his grip on her shoulder. She slipped out of the truck and walked into school followed by a frowning Sam.


	2. Chapter 2

Rachel's forearm was stinging as her t-shirt rubbed the cuts a little when she moved. It gave her something to focus on as flitted from class to class, avoiding the eyes of other students and throwing herself into the work. The time crawled by and the clock's ticks became slower and slower. Ray barely heard the teacher's voice, it was harder to concentrate on the information being told and her eyes never really wandered from the book in front of her. She had successfully evaded the insults and unwanted attention for most of the day and she was starting to hope that she could get through one day without any trouble. She slowly collected her belongings, waiting until everyone had left the English classroom before exiting herself, but as she went through the doorway she walked into something solid. Rachel glanced up in surprise but felt the colour drain from her face at the recognition of the solid object. Owen towered above her, a smirk on his face and muscly arms crossed over his chest. She stumbled back to try and retreat to safety but fell into one of friends who had moved behind her. The corridor was deserted as it was lunch period and everyone would be in the cafeteria. Panic rose in her throat at the smug looks on the boy's face.

"Hello whore." His friends sniggered. "How much do they pay you for a night or are you so desperate that it's free?" Rachel tried to step around Owen but he blocks her way. "Where are you going? No one wants to see your ugly mug."

"Please let me past." Her voice was quiet and mumbling. Owen laughed.

"Awh. Poor little Rachel wants to get past." He fake pouted. "Maybe if you were prettier and not so useless then I would let you by." His friends chuckled again, bearing their teeth in grimacing sneers. Rachel went to move by them again but he stepped in front of her again. "Listen. I don't like you. You're weird and poor and nerdy and, to be honest, even Joey here wouldn't sleep with you and he jumps anything." Joey's face twists in annoyance and the other friend laughs loudly, throwing his head back at Owen's remark. Suddenly, Rachel was shoved against the wall painfully and an arm was pressed on her throat. She scrambled at the pressure on her windpipe with her nails in an attempt to lessen the force but Owen only barked laughter at her struggle. He came in close to her face, so close she could smell tobacco on his breath and see the spittle at the corners of his thin mouth. Rachel flinched away in disgust. "You're a freak and it kind of revolts everyone that you are anywhere near them. I'm sure that even your family probably don't want you. So please, do everyone a favour and go and kill yourself." At that he let go of his hold on her and she crumpled to the floor, her legs too shaky to support her. Owen and his friends jeer at her but she doesn't respond and looks down. He gives a swift kick to her stomach, doubling her over and making her whimper. The three boys didn't even look at her as they went down the hall and turned the corner.

After a few moments she gathered her thoughts and got herself to her feet using the wall to help. Slowly Rachel picked up her bag where it was dropped and shuffled to the toilets, keeping her face down the whole time. She entered a stall mechanically and locked it behind her before gently sitting on the closed toilet seat. Her eyes wondered over the graffiti that littered the sides of the stall. Sharpie doodles of body parts decorated the surfaces and sentences insulting various students and teachers etched into the ply board with biros. The putrid stench of uncleaned toilets lingered in the air and mould gathered in the top corner at a damp spot. It was a horrid place to sit but Rachel really didn't care if no one would see her. She felt a tear roll down her cheek and let out a small sob. They were right. No one wanted her there, she was a freak and it would be good for everyone if she just died. She dragged a sleeve across her eyes to wipe the tears, refusing to let the hurt show, and stood up. Rachel cautiously lifted the hem of her t-shirt to find a bruise already blooming on her stomach where Owen had kicked her. She didn't understand why she never fought back or retorted with insults. Maybe it was the fact that she thought that she deserved it or the way that she had no clue of what to do in this situation. They weren't monsters. She couldn't gank them and move on. They were human and that threw her.

She exited the stall and looked at herself in the scummy mirrors and noticed her red eyes from tears and even paler face. Rachel quickly looked away in disgust at what she saw and left the toilets as the bell rang for next lesson.

o-o-o-0-o-o-o

Sam met his baby sister by the truck after the last bell rang. Her side was sore from the colouring bruise but Rachel tried not to show her discomfort, although there was an occasional wince which Sam thought was odd. She smiled at him but her eyes were flitting around the parking lot, scanning the crowds in search of possible threat. Sam, being tall for 17, didn't blend in that well, but he didn't really care. Rachel was also not short for her age but always seemed to shrink in public as though making herself smaller would protect her. Sam realised that his sister's stance had gotten more defensive recently, as though she was constantly expecting an attack. The worry for his sister sprung up again as he noticed an almost hurt expression on Rachel's face but, once again, he couldn't understand why. It was frustrating him that he was missing something important that was affecting her and it was equally annoying that she wouldn't tell him that something was wrong.

"Dad finally called. He and Dean will be home tonight." Sam smiled at his sister to try and silently reassure her that he was there for her. She returned the gesture but her mind was elsewhere. She was just hoping that maybe they could leave town when the other half of her family returned. The sooner they left the better.

"Cool. Are we gonna get going now Sammy?" Sam nodded in reply and hopped into the driver's side while Rachel carefully slid in next to him a bit more rigidly. As they pulled out of the parking lot, Rachel caught eye contact with Owen who crudely used his hands to pretend to hang himself, a gesture that was a quick reminder of their 'conversation' earlier. She flinched at the sight of him but the truck pulled into the traffic and blocked her view of him.

It wasn't long before they pulled into the drive way of the house that their dad had rented for the month but Sam was asking after his sister the entire way. Rachel quickly entered their makeshift home, trying to get away from Sam to avoid his persistent questions about her wellbeing. Sam just sighed and walked through the front door in pursuit of the young Winchester.

"Ray, seriously, we need to talk." She halted in her tracks as she was reaching for the handle of her bedroom.

"About what?" Her voice raised a pitch despite her attempt to make her voice sound normal.

"What are you not telling me Ray? I'm worried. You aren't eating as much, you're withdrawn and you look tired all the time." He frowned at her but she looked at her shoes. "I know I haven't looked out for you as much as usual but I have noticed little things. What I can't understand is what the cause is."

"Sammy, please, I'm fine." Unfortunately for Rachel, Sam was neither stupid nor gullible and as her voice cracked a little it was obvious that he knew it was a blatant lie.

"It's not me, is it?" Sam's face drained as he asked.

"No. God no." She quickly reassured Sam that it wasn't him.

"Then what is it? Dad is gonna be home in about an hour and he's going to ask about you and I'm going to sound like a crap big brother when I can't tell him what is wrong."

It was Ray's turn to have what little colour she had in her cheeks drain away. "Sammy, please there's nothing to tell him. Please don't tell him. I'm fine, really I am." She stammered out the words but neither sibling believed the words.

"Sweetie, he is going to notice. I mean you have changed a lot in the last week never mind the last 3. You're thinner, paler, and less lively. He is going to notice something is wrong." Rachel just shook her head and backed away.

"I'm fine." She raised her voice in emphasis and quickly turned and ran to her room, slamming the door.

Sam ran a hand over his face, growling in exhaustion and anger that he still didn't get to the bottom of the problem. All that conversation showed was that something was wrong and that Ray didn't want to tell him. It kind of hurt Sam that she didn't trust him enough to tell him but he couldn't force it or she would withdraw completely. Lost in thought, he set about cleaning his gun, using the systematic movements to calm him down.

Rachel threw herself onto her bed and let out a muffled scream into her pillow. How did she mess this up? She thought that she had persuaded Sam that she was okay. She thought that no one had noticed her deterioration. Her anger at herself turned to tears and she gritted her teeth in frustration that she was so weak. Ray's thoughts turned to Owen and his suggestion that she kills herself and it didn't seem so unreasonable. It would end all her pain and would unburden her family and maybe she could see her mum again.

The knife under her pillow was in her hand again. Rachel hadn't even thought about grabbing but it was there, in her palm. She rolled up her sleeve and observed the scabbed cuts from last night and the plump, white scars from the previous month and a bit. Maybe ending this would help everyone. The knife was placed vertically on her skin but her mind wandered to Sam who was in the other room. She couldn't let him find her dead. She couldn't let him get blamed by dad. Rachel threw the knife across the room where it lodged into the wall. Her head was screaming 'coward' but she couldn't bring herself to die. Curling up on her bed and clutching the pillow to her chest she drifted to sleep with self-hatred coursing in her veins and tears still wetting her cheeks.


	3. Chapter 3

John and Dean returned that evening to Sam asleep on an open book. He sat up quickly as the door was closed and rubbed his eyes.

"Hey Bro" Dean sent a weary smile towards Sam but was interrupted by his brother enveloping him in an uncharacteristic hug. "Wow. You're happy to see me."

"Sorry." Sam backed up a bit looking sheepish. "It's been a long 3 weeks you know."

"Hey Sam" John was standing in the room looking equally exhausted as his brother. "How have you been?"

"Not bad, struggling a bit on money the past week though." Sam replied as John frowned and looked around the room, only just realising that his youngest child wasn't present.

"Where's Rachel?" Dean also frowned as Sam sighed deeply and rubbed a hand across his face.

"In her room."

"Is she okay?" Dean's voice held a brotherly worry that they both knew very well.

"Umm, I need to talk to you about that." Sam's voice was quieter than usual and Dean felt a pang of concern in his stomach. He did not like that tone that Sam used. "She hasn't quite been herself recently."

John frowned even deeper. "What do you mean?"

"She is really withdrawn and something is defiantly wrong but she isn't telling me what. I tried to get her to tell me what was up today but she kept insisting that she was fine and then legged it to her room. She hasn't come out since."

"Dad? Dean?" All three men turned to see Rachel standing by her door with slightly red eyes.

"Hey Kiddo." Dean smiled but it quickly dropped as he saw the state she was in. She was thin, really thin, and her skin was gaunt. Her eyes were lifeless and the dark circles that ringed them were ghostly. Ray's smile never touched her eyes and she seemed to shrink away from light. John had also noticed how she looked and his fatherly instinct kicked in and it screamed that something was really wrong. The two elder Winchesters were snapped out of their shock at the sight of Rachel as she walked up to Dean and wrapped her slim arms around his waist in an embrace. Dean snaked his arms around his sister automatically but looked up to make eye contact with his dad, sharing a worried expression. Ray pulled back and went to briefly hug John in a greeting.

"Good to see you guys. Been a long time."

"Yeah. You too Ray." John replied, still frowning. "Are you okay?" Ray's false smile crumbled a bit.

"Yeah. I'm fine. Just tired." Her voice was a bit wobbly and she retreated back a step. "I think I'll go to bed. So, umm… night guys. Good to know you're both back safe." She turned and left the room a bit too quickly. Dean and John stood there looking at where she had once been, frowns on both of their faces. They turned to see Sam looking plagued with guilt and an expression of hurt on his face.

"What happened Sam?" John's voice was low and serious. "I knew she was a bit withdrawn when we left that place in Colorado but this is 10x worse."

"Honestly, I don't know." Sam had a crack in his voice and Dean realised how guilty he must feel about it. "I haven't been paying close attention the last week because I've been trying to keep the money going and school work has been hectic but this morning I realised that she seemed off but she brushed it off. Every time I try to bring it up she will leave the room or make excuses and the more I think about it the more I notice the subtler things. She doesn't eat much, she barely sleeps, she stays in her room, she showers less, she always seems defensive and her eyes are always looking around for danger that isn't there." His face fell. Dean observed his brother. He seemed crushed and, knowing Sam, he was probably beating himself up about the whole thing.

"Sammy, the most important thing right now is to figure out what is wrong with our baby sister. This isn't your fault." Dean tried to reassure the 17 year old.

"Yes, I agree with Dean. But first, we all need some sleep. I'll try to get her to talk tomorrow." John sighed and Dean knew he just wanted their small and slightly dysfunctional family to be okay. Ray was the lively little sister that kept the male Winchesters from being at each other's throats. All of them wanted that happy girl back.

o-o-o-0-o-o-o

Rachel didn't sleep more than a few hours that night. Her fight was fading and the more she thought about her current life, the less she wanted to live it. What was the point? She was a failure as a sister and a daughter and a hunter. She felt out of place with everyone. Her family were dangerously close to breaking her entire façade and she wondered briefly why she'd lied to them. But she shoved that thought from her brain as she remembered that she was a freak and they probably didn't care anyway. Ray felt a constant nagging in her head, a scratch inside her skull, a pressure on her mind that couldn't be relieved. She tossed and turned in her bed in an attempt to relax but to no avail. Rachel absentmindedly scratched her left arm in frustration and barely noticed as the tops of the scabs were peeled off by her nails. The tension in her chest was overwhelming and the sense of worthlessness was weighing down on her whole body. She was really tired but her overworking mind was keeping her blood pumping fast and her muscles tense, her own body betraying the calls of unconsciousness and refusing to let her relax. Ray kept on itching her arm, over and over, quicker and more forcefully with every thought that danced around in her skull. She didn't notice when a few cuts started to seep blood. She didn't notice when her nails had smears of crimson on the tips. She didn't notice when her skin broke slightly as she scraped her nails extra hard along her soft forearm. But she did notice the full, aching throb that heated her wrist. Rachel tiptoed to the bathroom without even turning on the light in the hall and assessed the damage while sitting on the toilet seat, mentally scolding herself for subconsciously messing up the healing cuts. Ray wetted some tissues and gently wiped the blood from her skin and checked that they clotted over again. The scratch mark wasn't deep or bloody but it left a pink line which would fortunately have faded by the morning. The cool water soothed her throbbing skin and she welcomed the icy feel and its numbing properties. As Ray dabbed her forearm with a towel, careful to not knock the scabs again, she regarded the scars littering her skin. It had all quickly fallen to pieces from the first time she'd cut. White scar tissue was lined up neatly in rows down her flesh. Some tiny and some deep. Each had a story, some tales which had been forgotten. The long one near her wrist was when she dropped her gun on a hunt and Sam had gotten knocked out by a ghost. The thin and shallow one halfway up her arm was when a girl at school in Colorado had called her fat so she refused to eat for 3 days before passing out while researching onto a surprised but worried John. The collection of tiny scars were from the hits Dean had received from a shapeshifter that she had failed to take down. The pink and healing one was a week ago when Owen told her she was too stupid to have friends and made everyone pretend that she didn't exist. Rachel hated that she did this but she gave up dwelling about the effects a while back when she realised that she didn't mind if she ever bled out and died. Rachel had literally passed the point of caring if she lived or not and, after recent events, she was more and more likely to make an attempt in cutting her meaningless existence short. She shook her head to try and make the overwhelming feelings crawl back to the depths of her mind and leave her alone to sleep. As Ray made her way back to bed she decided that she should be nicer to Sammy. He hadn't asked for any of this and he certainly didn't deserve her attitude. Rachel thought that maybe she should quit talking so much and keep her head down and get on with her life until it gets too much. Through her eyes it seemed like she loved her family but they did not love her.


	4. Chapter 4

Ray woke up groggily, even more tired than before, and spent a good five minutes just lying in bed trying to gain the motivation to leave the warm safety of the sheets where nothing was wrong and she felt a bit calmer. Sadly it didn't take long for the heavy feeling to return to crush her chest and make her get up and drag herself to get dressed. Everything seemed to take longer than usual. Putting on each item of clothing was slow and aching due to her crippling fatigue and the sore blue bruise on her stomach from Owen's kick yesterday, but eventually she was fully dressed and her hair was kept up in a messy bun as she hadn't washed it in a bit. Rachel shuffled to the kitchen and made a cup coffee, not missing the three sets of eyes that occasionally sent glances her way. She didn't say anything until she could feel the effects of the hot coffee searing through her and the caffeine kicked her mind into something that resembled a more awake state.

"Since when did you drink coffee?" Dean questioned, curious as to why someone who disliked coffee looked like they depended heavily on the liquid.

Rachel shrugged in reply, eyes on the cup. She had to admit that coffee tasted disgusting and bitter plus it smelt awful, but the warmth spread gently into her fingers as she held it and the caffeine buzzed in her blood and it kept her going through the day despite her lack of sleep, so the benefits outweighed the atrocious taste.

Only a few words were exchanged between the four Winchesters, all of them tired and hating the fact that they were awake this early on a Wednesday. John left before the others to 'run errands' and do whatever the oldest Winchester does when he disappears for the day but did quietly promise Dean that he would be back in the evening to force his daughter to talk about what it is that's bothering her. His eldest son nodded to gesture that he heard John and watched as his father left in his truck.

"Come on kiddos, or you'll be late for school." Dean called into the kitchen for his younger siblings to get a move on.

Sam and Rachel were dropped at school by Dean in the Impala. Dean lent over and caught Sam's wrist as he was about to clamber out of the front seat to go inside. Ray continued to walk away from the car, lost in thought and not noticing that she left her brother behind.

"Sammy, just keep an eye on her today will you?" Dean's eyes were tired and still their usual bottle green but they held a flicker of concern that seemed to have stayed since he had seen his sister yesterday.

"I will Dean. I'm just as worried as you." Sam's wrist was released as he spoke and after a fleeting goodbye he walked in through the doors not even glancing at the Impala rumble down the road.

o-o-o-0-o-o-o

Ray was subjected to a horrific day. She got shoved into a locker before first period even began and two girls sniggered at her from the corner of the room in math class. Pieces of paper were chucked at her head with quite an impressive range of insulting vocabulary to follow. With each insult and abuse she received, her heart sank ever lower and her eyes looked further towards the floor to avoid eye contact. Rachel had purposely evaded Sam the whole day, slipping into an empty classroom when she saw him approaching and losing him in a crowd when he spotted her. The horrifyingly awful day was crawling by and Ray's motivation levels, along with her self-esteem, had hit rock bottom. She was prepared to do pretty much anything for this day to be over. This school sucked and Ray hated it. If she had to choose between going to this school for a day and attempting to take out three vampires at once with one hand behind her back, Rachel would pick the latter without a second thought otherwise. She hid in the library for the entirety of lunch and dodged her brother, who obviously wanted a talk that she didn't, and any other student who could possibly abuse her even more. Unfortunately, her day went from bad to worse. Owen and his buddies managed to accost her on the way to her last lesson, in an abandoned hallway in a distant corner of the school, with nowhere to hide. Upon seeing that she had nowhere to run from the trio, Ray wanted to curl up and die and make her problems disappear.

"Hello again!" Owen spoke loudly and Rachel shied away from them, slowly backing away, hoping that they didn't notice. "Oh dear, Rachel. You disappoint us. I thought you had understood our little conversation previously and topped yourself. Really Rachel, I thought you would at least try." He shook his head in mock scolding.

"Please, leave me alone." A burst of adrenaline gave Ray a little confidence to turn and walk the opposite way down the hallway. Her escape attempt was short lived as she felt a hand grab her shoulder and spin her around before backhanding her cheek with quite a bit of strength. She stumbled back, falling to the floor and into the wall from the force of the hit and clutched her cheek.

"Listen, whore. No one wants you here and I thought you could see that too." Owen glared down at the girl shrinking away from him before slipping into a sneer that contorted his face in a look of pure hatred.

Ray slowly got to her feet in preparation to run but she barely had time to steady herself before Owen's friend, she keeps forgetting his name, shoved her into the wall and punched her in the side of her abdomen. A rough hand found her throat and pressed on her windpipe tightly. Her hunt training kicked in and she attempted to twist the hand away and kick his stomach. Ray kept struggling and fighting to get free but the three boys were bigger, stronger and had her at a disadvantage. She got a few good kicks in but Owen fought back, hitting her midsection and using his large foot to take out her legs and making her land harshly on her back. The other friend, Joey, reached down and pulled her up by clenching the collar of her shirt in his fist.

"Now, Rachel, if you aren't going to kill yourself like everyone wishes then you may as well be useful for something. You have two options. Be our personal punch bag or be our whore. Or the other option is, of course, to leave and never come back. It's up to you or we will choose for you."

Rachel's collar was dropped but she luckily remained standing, even though her knees trembled violently. She neither wanted to be beat up every day nor did she want to sleep with 3 boys whenever they wanted. Ray was starting to see more and more benefits in dying.

Owen leaned in close again. "Until tomorrow, whore." The three boys retreated away grinning evilly and stalked off.

Ray once again gathered her stuff and shuffled to the nearest toilet. In the mirror on the wall, a pale, thin girl stood. Her cheek had a yellowing bruise around a minute cut from where it was slapped and she stood lopsidedly due to the blue colouring blooming over her stomach and part of her back. Her neck also had finger marks which were slowly appearing in a greyish shade of blue. This gaunt, sickly looking girl was meant to be Rachel Winchester but the girl in question barely recognised herself. Tears fell onto her soft cheeks and she wrapped her arms around her ribs to keep in the sobs. She realised that some of her bruises were very visible and she really did not want her family to see how weak she was. Ray zipped up her hoodie so most of her neck was hidden and let her hair down to cover the small split in her skin on her cheek. She practised walking without wincing as her colourful abdomen was painful when she moved. When Rachel was vaguely satisfied that she could, sort of, fake being fine, it was nearly the end of the day. She decided it wouldn't be wise to go to class now as that would draw attention to her, so she sat on a closed toilet seat again to wait until the final bell rang.


	5. Chapter 5

Sam folded himself into the front of the Impala after school. "Hey Dean"

"Hey Sammy. Did you keep an eye on Rach?" Sam could tell that his brother had been worrying all day.

"I think she purposely avoided me all day. Whenever I tried to approach her she would disappear and I couldn't find her." Both siblings sighed in concern.

"Well Dad, surprisingly, is back from where ever he went so we can confront her as soon as we get home. To be honest, I wasn't expecting Dad back until much later. That means he is more worried than he is letting on." Sam nodded.

They both spotted their sister, hood up and head down, heading towards the car. She climbed stiffly into the back and closed the door gently.

"Hey Ray" Dean said, putting on a smile and light voice.

"Hey" Her reply was monotone and she didn't even lift her head. The brothers made eye contact in apprehension at her uncharacteristic behaviour but Dean quickly looked away and started the Impala.

Ray felt a sense of foreboding as the car pulled into the drive. She cautiously exited the car and made her way directly to the front door. As she entered the kitchen Rachel saw her father sitting at the table looking grave. Dean came up behind where she had stopped in the doorway and gently placed a hand on her back to push her into the room.

"Ray, we need to talk" Rachel felt her heart stop at John's words and her head was too messy to quickly think of a response.

"Do we… umm, what about… urrh, can we do it another… umm…"

"Kiddo, we are really worried about you" Dean just ignored her stumbling words.

"Rachel, please have a seat." Her father gestured to the other chair. She stiffly shuffled to the seat but didn't sit, just stood behind it not making eye contact with anyone. "You need to tell us what is wrong. That isn't me asking nicely, that is me telling you that it is important that we know. We are family and we need to know what is getting to you."

Ray didn't answer, she just shook slightly and she stood there. "Ray? Can I see your face?"

She knew that it would turn ugly if she refused to take off her hood so her shaky hand pushed it off her head and her chin lifted an inch. "Ray! What happened?!" Dean spluttered, seeing the cut and bruising.

"I… umm… walked into a door" Ray's questioning tone confirmed that she was lying. She was usually a smooth liar but with a jumbled head and the atmosphere in the room threw her off a bit. Her eldest brother crossed the room to lift her chin and inspect her cheek.

"What. Happened?" Dean was more forceful this time but her lips pressed into a thin line. "Talk to us, Ray" He poked her stomach lightly to prompt a response but it made her wince automatically as Dean touched a bruise. He immediately stepped back in shock.

"Lift your shirt" John had been observing the two siblings and had noticed Rachel's sign of pain. She shook her head and stumbled backwards to get away from her approaching brother. "Rachel! Lift your shirt. Now"

She tripped over and fell onto her butt still trying to shuffle backwards. Dean, taking matters into his own hands, lunged forward and captured his baby sister's hands in one of his and pinned them to the floor. He moved so that he was kneeling with a leg either side of her thighs. Ray tried to struggle free, squirming under him, but he was much taller and heavier so she was unable to get away.

Energy drained from her whole day, Rachel went limp on the floor and began to silently cry as Dean lifted the hem of her shirt and gasped.

"Oh my God" Dean stood, quickly getting off of his sister, but she didn't move. Ray just laid there, both hands over her face as her sobs filled the room. Suddenly, she felt strong arms reach under her shoulders and pull her to a sitting position before lifting her onto a lap and enveloping her in a hug. She turned into their chest and could smell the scent of gunpowder, whiskey and hotel soap that belonged to Dean. Her small hands fisted in his shirt and Ray could feel him gently rock her backwards and forwards to try to comfort his sobbing sister. Rachel's cries died out and she pulled herself together a bit before dragging her head away from Dean's t-shirt.

"Kiddo, it's really important that you tell me who did this" Dean, the usually strong and cocky brother, had wet eyes that also held a burning rage. No answer. "Was it kids at school?" Ray nodded shakily and felt Dean tense against her.

"Who?" Sam's voice was quiet but as she looked at him Rachel saw the anger in his eyes just like Deans.

"Owen and his friends" She hid her face quickly in embarrassment. Silence filled the air again.

"Ray, I need to look at your bruises properly to check the amount of damage. Can you take off your shirt please?" Dean was firm but his little sister froze. They would see her arm.

"Do you… do you have to?"

"Yes" Ray heard no room for argument and decided that she would take off her shirt and face the consequences like a Winchester.

Dean got to his feet and carried her to the bathroom leaving a silent but livid John and Sam in the kitchen. He thought that Rachel would appreciate less of an audience. Setting her gently down on the side of the bath, Dean reached for the first aid box to look for something that could help bruising. The young Winchester lifted shaky hands to pull down the zip of her hoodie before letting it drop to the floor and moving to undo the top three buttons. Ray held a breath for the inevitable pain of moving and in anticipation of Dean's reaction. The eldest Winchester brother turned as Rachel dropped her shirt to the floor to join the hoodie but stopped as he noticed her. Blue, purple, green and yellow spread over her stomach and around her lower back, finger print sized bruises were on her neck and she winced when she moved.

"Oh my God" Dean's face was a picture of pure, white hot anger that was tinged with guilt. "He choked you?" His voice was a whisper, but his sister heard and looked away, cheeks reddening. Ray didn't say anything but Dean knew the answer.

Kneeling down, Dean probed the bruises as delicately as possible to check if there was further damage but thankfully all her bones were okay. Then he saw them. His eyebrows knitted together and his jaw set. Dean grabbed Ray's left arm and pulled it away from her body roughly to inspect. His face drained of colour as he realised what he was seeing. His baby sister had enough self-hatred to cause herself pain. Scars lined her forearm and he felt guilty for each one, wanting to wipe each mark away and all the pain she had felt with it. The newest ones were red and puffy, standing out from the white scar tissue and pale skin, but seemed clean enough and healing. Dean looked up, tears in his eyes, at Ray who looked at something vastly interesting in the corner.

Ray noticed Dean stand up before turning and walking out of the room. Thoughts of losing Dean now he knew she was a freak filled her cloudy mind and caused large, hot tears to spill over her bottom eyelashes and onto her cheeks. Before her brain could come up with a wild theory as to where Dean decided her would abandon her, he returned, trailing behind John who looked to be angry.

"What the hell Ray?" John sounded genuinely concerned but she didn't have time to dwell on the emotion behind the voice before crumbling into a sobbing mess. Her father's arms pulled her into a strong embrace that was very un-John-like but appreciated. When she looked up she noticed her siblings by the door looking grave and sad.

"Do you hate me now?" she mumbled into her dad's chest, he noticed the tone of worry in her crackly voice and he closed his eyes in wonder of what happened to his innocent baby girl.

"No Ray. No one here hates you. I'm a bit annoyed that you didn't tell us but I could never hate you." Rachel let out a breath she hadn't realised she'd been holding. "Boys, go back to the kitchen. I'm going to clean up Ray here and then she'd going to tell us exactly what has been happening" A gentle tone rang through his words but they all knew he wouldn't take no as an answer so Dean and Sam retreated to the other room.

o-o-o-0-o-o-o

After silently treating the bruises and checking that the cuts were healing, John gave his daughter the baggy t-shirt that she used as a pyjama top and led her back to the kitchen. Ray carefully sat on a chair at the table and looked at her intertwining fingers that rested in her lap.

"Rachel. You need to explain" John's voice was unusually soft but Ray understood that she was probably looking like an injured animal right now and she wouldn't cope if someone shouted.

"Ask away" That's all she could manage in her hoarse whisper.

"When did you start… you know…"

"About a month and a bit ago" She didn't need him to finish the sentence to know what he would ask.

"Why?" Rachel glanced at Sam in surprise that another voice spoke.

"I deserve it" She was threatening tears again but after a silent pep talk Ray had her watery eyes under control.

"No you don't Ray. You're amazing and smart and beautiful and the best little sister ever" She flinched at the kind words, not used to the compliments, which all three Winchesters noticed.

"What about this bullying thing? When did that start?" It was Dean's turn to question now.

"I've never really had friends at school. I'm not very likable. But the previous school in Colorado was hell and I was weak and couldn't take it so…" They all knew she was referencing her nasty habit but let her continue. "But this school is even worse"

"What happened kiddo?"

"Umm… well there's this boy, Owen, in my grade and he doesn't like me. I would've been okay coping but he made everyone else hate me too. I get hate from everyone. I never fight back though because I know they only speak the truth" Ray managed to mumble the whole thing out, still avoiding eye contact, too embarrassed.

"Okay. You do realise that what they say is probably not true?" Sam looked sympathetic as he spoke. "I know how you feel sweetie. I was picked on too. It never got this bad but I know now that what they said were lies" Ray blinked at him, still not believing that their words were false.

"What about the bruises?" John asked.

"Well… umm… well he would shove me into lockers and push past me but… umm… yesterday he kicked me in the stomach and then today he found me and… umm… did this" Ray gestured in the general direction of her abdomen.

"Why?"

She looked down ashamed with what she had to say. "He threatened me"

"How did he threaten you?" With each question, Dean's voice grew lower and more furious. Ray was barely whispering by now but due to the silence in the room her family still heard.

"He said I could either be their punching bag or their whore to sleep with whenever they want" Dean snarled at her response and jumped to his feet and began to pace angrily. John looked just as pissed off.

"They didn't… you know… touch you did they?" John almost growled the words but he fractionally relaxed as she shook her head in response.

"I'm sorry. I fucked up didn't I? I always do. I should have taken their advice" Ray was hysterically blabbing her thoughts, more to herself than her family, but she realised what she'd said a bit too late.

"What advice?" Rachel shook her head, wide eyed, at Dean. "Rachel. Answer me. What advice?" Something inside he broke, the wall that was holding everything back had been wearing down during the evening but her brother's forceful question made her self-control snap.

"They told me I should go and kill myself because I was ugly and fat and disappointing and stupid and useless and worthless and a burden on everyone. And I fucking believe every word they said and I almost fucking did top myself but I was too much of a coward. I couldn't do it. I'm a failure as a daughter and a sister and a hunter and as a person and I couldn't do the only good thing and fucking die!" She was shouting during her outburst, chest rising and falling heavily as unwanted tears fell for the third time that evening, but she wasn't quite done. "I was a coward and I was weak and I'm a burden on everyone. I don't understand why you are still here with me because if I were you, I would hate me! I am the only reason mum died. It should've been me. She deserved to live way more than I do"

There it was. Now her whole family knew what she thought. Ray took a cautious glance at her dad but regretted it. He was open mouthed and had heavy breaths with a fiery gleam in his eyes. Dean and Sam held looks of shock and heartbreak which made Ray feel instantly guilty for her confessions. A full minute passed but John still stayed silent and broody. All of a sudden John began to shout.

"What the hell?! Rachel Winchester you are none of those things. I am fucking livid right now but not at you. I am angry at those boys for laying a hand on you. I am angry at myself for not noticing something was wrong sooner. I am angry at life for giving you a shit time and making your self-esteem so low. But I am not angry at you. And never, not once in my life have I or will I ever blame any of my children for Mary's death and I can assure you that if you had died instead of her we wouldn't function and she wouldn't cope with not saving her little girl. I am so glad that I have all of my children, no matter how much I order you around and push you and how crappy of a father I am, you will always be the most important people in my life. We would be much worse off if you had died. I would never have forgiven myself if you killed yourself. Never, ever, do that. So you have got to understand that none of what you just said is true!"

Ray stood frozen at John's response, face pale with shock at the meaningful words that fell from the mouth of the least emotional person she knew. Her brothers had equally shocked faces at their uncharacteristic father. This evening was truly eye opening.

John broke the stillness in the room and walked to the fridge to grab a beer. Dean snapped from his reverie and strode across the room to grab his sister into yet another hug.

"This has got to stop. Baby, I'd die if you did. Please stop hurting yourself too. It hurts to see you in pain. Come to me okay, whenever you want to, come and see me. I will drop everything to help you. We all love you and we all need you" Dean rocked her comfortingly and Ray, for the first time in a while, felt truly loved. She pulled away from him and went to hug Sam.

"I am so sorry Sammy. I am so sorry for not coming to you. I'm sorry for being bitchy to you all week" She muttered into his shoulder.

"No. I'm sorry, Ray. I should have made you tell me. But in future, never hide something like that from me. Okay?" Rachel nodded and savoured the feeling of Sam's arms squeeze her closer.

"Now, Ray, what are we going to do to solve this?" John took a swig from his beer and looked at her questioningly from the table where he had plonked himself.

"I… I really don't know what to do" Ray sighed.

"I think you should go to school tomorrow" Dean started to protest to his father but John held up a hand and silenced him. "Stay with Sam and stay with the crowd. Avoid these boys. But if they come near you, kick their asses. I know that you are a good fighter, better than them, but you have to surprise them. Don't wait for them to move first. We are leaving tomorrow anyway so it's only one day to get through. Can you do that or would you prefer not to?"

Ray felt the overwhelming need to prove her strength, even if it was only to herself. "Okay. I'll do that"

"Seriously kiddo, don't let them push you around. And if any of them… touch you, kick them in the balls and run to Sam or ring me" Rachel blushed a little but nodded.


	6. Chapter 6

The rest of their evening was quiet but homely. Ray ate dinner after Sam had lectured her on the importance of eating enough. She decided that she would try to eat more, for Sammy. The rest of their day was relatively normal. The whole day had been tiring and she shuffled off to bed to crash. Her chest felt a bit lighter knowing that her family didn't reject her and that she could tell them anything but, much to her annoyance, the self-loathing still hadn't completely gone. Some of her thoughts had vanished, the more reasonable part of her brain kicking in to counter them, but some of the more stubborn ones had firmly stuck. Ray knew she wouldn't be better overnight and the addictive want to slice her own skin was still itching in her brain but she had hoped that maybe she could've slept more than a few hours that night. Rachel lay in her bed feeling exhausted but unable to sleep. She knew that cutting would help relieve some pressure, enough to make her sleep, but she didn't want to let her family down so soon. Ray slipped out of bed and padded to her brothers door, pushing it gently open. It was 1:00am but Dean seemed to still be awake with the bedside lamp on and in bed writing something in his hunter's journal.

"Dean?" Ray whispered at her brother, startling him but he visibly relaxed when he saw her.

"Ray? What's up?"

"You said… said I could come to you whenever I wanted to…" She trailed off but Dean understood.

"Can't sleep squirt?" Ray shook her head. "Come here" Dean put the journal and pen on the bedside table and lifted one side of the covers as an invitation for his sister to join him. She crawled in close next to Dean and he snaked and arm around her protectively. "I love you kiddo. Thank you for coming here instead" He kissed her head lovingly and she snuggled in closer to his side, laying her head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat. The familiar smell of Dean filled her lungs and his radiating warmth relaxed her, pushing her sleepiness to the forefront of her mind, making her eyelids droop. Her brother hummed 'Hey Jude' softly and Ray fell into the best sleep she'd had in weeks to the sound of Dean's chest making deep vibrations as he hummed the comforting tune. She felt safe.

o-o-o-0-o-o-o

John came into Dean's room to wake him up but stopped as he noticed Ray curled around his side sleeping peacefully. He decided she needed the rest and quietly backed out, leaving the two siblings to rest a while longer. John hadn't seen his children that content in a long time, and after yesterday's revelations, God knows they deserved it. The Winchester father was still heartbroken from his little girl's confessions, it hurt to see her in so much pain and not come to her family for help, but after last night he hoped that things would improve. John had seen the bruises that those _boys_ had caused and he wasn't just going to let that slide, despite what he had told his daughter. He knew that Dean and Sam felt the same. No way would the Winchesters ignore what they'd done. They were skipping town tomorrow for the next hunt so they may as well make the most of their quick disappearance and teach some teenagers a lesson. John, of course, couldn't get away so easily for hitting boys so young, but his sons could. He smiled to himself. Those boys should never have messed with a Winchester.

Sammy came into the kitchen looking bedraggled with his bed hair and baggy pyjamas and shuffled to make coffee. John smirked at his son's dazed complexion as he poured a large mug of caffeine.

"Where are Dean and Ray?" Sam had only just realised the lack of his brother's jokes and his sister's grumbles about mornings.

"Still asleep" Sam didn't question further as he knew that they were okay but he did wonder why dad hadn't got them up yet.

Dean surfaced from his room not long after Sam looking surprisingly awake. He didn't mention that John hadn't woken him up but it probably had something to do with Ray sleeping next to him and Dean appreciated that his dad had let her rest.

The amount of coffee that was consumed in their family had increased recently and the want of the warming liquid seemed to be never ending for the Winchesters. John, Dean and Sam were all on their second cup when Ray appeared from Dean's room but she didn't say anything until she had taken a swig from her own mug of coffee. Sam smirked to himself as he recognised the dependency on coffee (and whiskey) to be a strong Winchester trait.

Rachel hadn't slept so well in a long time and for once, when she awoke her body seemed lighter and her eyes seemed more focused and her stand was steadier. She wished she could have more sleeps like that one but she knew that she probably wouldn't. Ray did realise that it was much easier to sleep while curled up next to her brother, he made her feel safe and loved and, as he basically been her mother, he knew how to calm her down. Sam had a similar effect but him being a lanky teenager who couldn't stay still, she didn't really think she could share a bed. Having lived in motels for most of her life, sharing a bed with Dean was like reliving a childhood memory. It reminded her of all the times she would wake after nightmares and have him to look after her. Last night was not that different and it made her feel at home.

The Winchesters threw on some clothes and got into the Impala to go to school. As they neared, Ray felt her stomach sink a bit in worry for what the day held but she held her nerve. Dean turned to her when they'd pulled in a concerned look etched on his face.

"Okay kiddo. You ready? Remember what I said. Call me anytime you want and stick with Sam. You'll be okay" He leant over and kissed her forehead with brotherly love. He was a violent, intimidating hunter but, when it concerned his siblings Dean was an overprotective and gentle big brother. Often people were shocked to see that side of him but he didn't care about what they thought. His family was worth everything. Ray nodded to show she understood. "Love you"

"Love you too" She mumbled in reply before following Sam closely into school. Dean sighed to himself as he watched them go, hoping that his baby sister would be okay.

Ray didn't know whether it was the fact that her confidence had grown a little or just luck, but her day was reasonably quiet. She blocked out the insulting teenagers and stuck near her brother when possible so she felt more secure, but, for the first time while in that school, Ray didn't want to die by the last lesson. She still feared that she would turn a corner and Owen would be there but Rachel avoided empty corridors and never waited for classes to empty before leaving like she used to. School still wasn't fun, nor was it where she'd like to be, but it was an improvement. As the final bell went to signal the end of the day, Ray quickly went to her locker to collect all of her stuff, knowing that she would never return to this school, not that she would even if the chance arose. She hitched her messenger bag onto her shoulder and hurried to the front entrance, very aware that most other people had already left in the rush to get home. Ray's eyes were flitting around her surroundings as she walked, checking for danger, but she quickly made it to the exit. She saw the Impala waiting in the distance and started to head in that direction, only to be spun around and shoved against the walk. Her eyes widened in recognition. Owen. His friends were lurking behind him sniggering as he pushed a forearm under her chin and brought his face really near to hers.

"Made your decision yet Rachel, because I'm feeling up for quickie" He winked at her with a sneer on his lips. She snapped out of her fearful state as his hand grabbed the top her thigh. This was different to a punch or a slap or a kick. It was violating and made her pent up anger boil to the surface. Ray clenched her teeth and sent a well-aimed knee to Owen's groin and twisted his wrist to force his arm away from her neck. He cried out in surprise and pain, not expecting the girl to be fighting back so much and underestimating her strength. Owen stumbled back giving Ray enough room to bolt towards the Impala. She didn't get more than 6 feet before meeting her two older brothers looking angrier than she'd ever seen them. Dean and Sam had seen the whole scene an obviously hadn't appreciated their sister's unwanted attention. Rachel halted in front of them, breathing heavily from the adrenaline, but feeling the anger turn to shock and fear at what had just happened. Dean gave his baby sister a brotherly look to check for any injuries but found her intact, just shivering and wide eyed.

"Are you okay?" Sam asked, his eyes giving away his fury.

"I think so" Ray replied quietly, nodding gently and trying not to cry. She was definitely in shock. Her limbs couldn't move and she just stood there with her arms wrapped around her torso protectively. Her brothers noticed her scared expression and it made their rage burn hotter.

Now knowing that Ray was uninjured, they walked past their sister and towards Owen who was clutching his groin and groaning while his friends chuckled at his misfortune. None of them saw two fuming Winchesters heading their way. The three boys looked up to look for what was blocking out the light and casting a shadow over them. The two friends gulped and backed away in cowardice before turning to run. Sam and Dean let them leave, their sights set only on Owen.

"Hello Owen" Dean nearly snarled at the boy but Owen, being rather dumb, didn't see their furious expressions and just acted his cocky self, inadvertently making it worse for himself.

"What do you want?" Owen asked harshly, straightening himself to full height as though he was sizing them up. For a 16 year old he was huge and bulky, much bigger than Ray, but he didn't have anything on Dean or Sam. The Winchester sons were tall and had toned muscles that were tensed under their shirts. They were trained in combat by their father and would have no trouble in killing Owen if they wanted to with a quick snap of the neck. The boy that faced them set his face, cocky smile faltering slightly at their size but still holding a big-headed expression as though challenging them.

"I believe you know Rachel Winchester?" Sam growled.

"Ah yes. That little bitch just kicked me in the balls. She'll pay for that." He muttered the last bit more to himself than anyone else, still not realising who he was talking to. "Who are you anyway?"

Dean snorted but in no way was it humorous. "Dean and Sam" he gestured to themselves before adding, "Winchester"

If was Dean was not so angry that he could destroy a wall, he would have laughed at the look that fell across Owen's face. His eyes widened, finally clicking that he was in trouble and had made it worse with what he had just said, and his mouth twisted in fear and shock. He didn't have time to compose himself before a fist fell over his jaw knocking him backwards. Dean proceeded to grab the boy's throat and slam him into the wall.

"No one can threaten and hurt my sister and get away with it" Dean spat venomously at Owen. "If you weren't as young I would kill you slowly and painfully"

Dean stepped back letting go of his neck and watched as Owen struggled to stand. He caught his breath before sending a fist towards Sam. Sam caught the clenched hand in his own, reflexes heightened by the adrenaline, and twisted it, Owen's whole arm bending unnaturally causing him to shout in pain. The tall Winchester sent a kick to the boy's knee and made him fall backwards.

"By the end of this _Owen_ , you'll wish that you never lay hands on Ray. And you will learn to never touch a girl again" Sam growled before kicking him over.

Rachel stood stock still as she watched her brothers and Owen. Dean turned towards her and away from the boy lying at his feet.

"Kiddo, I think you should wait in the Impala" She dragged her eyes to Dean's from where she had been staring into space and nodded slowly. Ray took a second for her legs to obey but she managed to get to the car and clamber into the back. She automatically turned to watch her brothers but forced her gaze away as she saw the Winchester sons drag a struggling Owen around the side of the building where no one could see. Not wanting to focus on what was going to happen she lay on the leather seat and curled into a tight ball, shutting her eyes to try and calm herself down.

After what seemed like ages, the car door opened and strong arms scooped her up and place her on a lap. Ray opened her eyes and released some of the tension in her muscles as she saw Dean's face looking down at her.

"Are you okay?" Dean had his brotherly protective face on and she was glad. Ray didn't feel like facing any other side of Dean in her state of strange and unexplainable shock, but Dean somehow already knew that. It was something that was in Owen's eyes, an evil glint that showed he really meant to follow through with the threat and the way he thought that he was better than everyone else, that scared Rachel more than any monster. For someone who killed things for the family business, she was really a non-violent person and hated to hurt another human being. So, she supposed, that was why she was so hurt by it all. A human had wanted to hurt and violate her and she felt guilty for kneeing him. "Ray?" Dean prompted again.

"I'll be okay. I think I'm in shock" Her voice was quiet and rough.

"I'm not surprised kiddo. I'm sorry he put his filthy hands on you baby girl. But he won't be touching anyone else for a long time now. He deserved what we gave him" He grinned a little as he finished the sentence and that made Ray smile a little too. "If this ever happens again, you tell me or Sammy or dad. Tell us as soon as it happens" Rachel nodded. "You are going to be happy again kiddo" Dean said it with such a gentle but definite force that Ray was made to believe him.


	7. Chapter 7

When the Winchester children got back to the house, John was anxiously waiting for them. As soon as the three siblings came into the kitchen though, their father relaxed. He looked over Ray to see if she was hurt until he was satisfied that she was uninjured.

"What happened? You were quite a while"

"Well, Owen decided to put his hands on Ray right in front of us so we beat the little shit up" Sam smirked and rubbed his knuckles that appeared red and sore. Neither brother cared about their smarting fists, nor did they care that the blood that was dried on them was mainly not theirs, the siblings felt calmer and had no regret for making that boy cry.

John had frozen at Sam's words. "What the fuck?"

"I know" Dean replied. "Utter idiot. He's lucky that I didn't kill him. Although Rachel here gave him a very hard kick to the balls" He grinned proudly at his sister and Ray felt a sense of reassurance wash over her.

"Are you okay kid?" John asked

"Yeah. I think so. I am now. Thank you guys" She blushed.

"Anytime sweetie. No one hurts you and gets away with it" Both brothers sent a smile her way.

The family of four spent the evening watching old movies and packing up their stuff ready to move that night, no one mentioning what had happened. For neither the first or last time, Ray was very glad she had two over protective brothers and a watchful father. She still had trouble sleeping. She still had a lot of self-loathing and doubt occasionally. She still felt an urge to cut from time to time. She still got picked on at schools sometimes. But it would get better. Ray had a family who loved her and who would protect her with their lives and although they were dysfunctional and drank too much and hunted monsters, the Winchesters were okay.

And many years later, when the family were on a hunt, she saved a man from being mauled by a werewolf who turned out to be Owen. He repeatedly apologised for his behaviour when he was 16, constantly sending her brothers fearful looks as though they would attack and promised that he regretted what he did and learnt a valuable lesson. But all his grovelling didn't stop her from punching him in the nose. It made Sam and Dean proud.

o-o-o-FIN-o-o-o


End file.
